NirvanaPeace

Peace, Love, Joy, and Imagination…

Thoughts on Getting Older…

Birds of a
feather flock together and

crap on your car.

When I’m feeling down, I like to whistle. It
makes the neighbor’s dog run to the end
of his chain and gag himself.

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The real art of conversation is not only to say
the right thing at the right time, but also to leave
unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight,
because by then your body and your fat
have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around
the house is to buy a replacement.

He who hesitates is probably right.

Did you ever notice: The Roman
Numerals for forty (40) are ‘ XL.’

If you think there is good in everybody,
you haven’t met everybody.

If you can smile when things go wrong,
you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child’s middle name
is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.

There’s always a lot to be thankful for if you take time
to look for it. For example I am sitting here
thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don’t hurt.

Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words
‘The’ and ‘IRS’ together it spells ‘Theirs.’

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop
lying about your age and start bragging about it.

The older we get, the fewer things
seem worth waiting in line for..

When you are dissatisfied and would like
to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

You know you are getting old when
everything either dries up or leaks.

One of the many things no one tells you about
aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

Ah, being young is beautiful,
but being old is comfortable.

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then
you forget to pull up your zipper. It’s worse
when you forget to pull it down.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not
me, I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way.
I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

January 19, 2009 Posted by | Dealing with..., Funnies | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Quotes of the Day

“I finally met the perfect woman, a fact I can’t ignore, she’s deaf and dumb and over sexed, and owns a liquor store.”

“Take good care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”

“The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.”

“Courtesy and Tolerance………Courtesy begets Tolerance and Tolerance begets Courtesy.”

“A man’s got to know his limitations.” Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry

“Never put your motorcycle where your brain hasn’t already been.”

“Remember people……It’s just your opinion.”

Then, “Atlas Shrugged…”
In the world of Atlas Shrugged, society stagnates when independent productive achievers began to be socially demonized and even punished for their accomplishments, even though society had been far more healthy and prosperous by allowing, encouraging and rewarding self-reliance and individual achievement. Independence and personal happiness flourished to the extent that people were free, and achievement was rewarded to the extent that individual ownership of private property was strictly respected. The hero, John Galt, lives a life of laissez-faire capitalism as the only way to live consistent with his beliefs.

“I didn’t say I wouldn’t go fishin’ with the man”.

 “Lord thy sea is so great, my ship is so small.”

“The inherent vice of capitalism is the uneven division of blessings, while the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal division of misery.” Churchill

“All women are beautiful, and some are more beautiful than others.”

“Live for today, plan for the weekend……….”

“Life is a Journey. Enjoy it. You only get one.”

“A person 20 years old who is not a liberal has no heart, a person 40 years old who is not a conservative has no brain.”

“The toss doesn’t matter if you can’t see both sides of the coin.”

“get your motor running / head out on the highway / lookin’ for adventure / in whatever comes our way.”
“Born to Be Wild”

“The Biological purpose of pain is to prevent the recurrence of Stupidity.”

“blue jean baby LA lady she married a music man Ballerina you must have seen her dancing in the sand”- Elton John

“Karma is a beautiful thing.”

“If it’s got gears, electronics, or ****…it’s GONNA give guys problems.”

“There’s such a fine line between clever and stupid.”

“How hard can it be?” What people usually say before they do something really, really stupid.

“Annoy a liberal…..be prosperous and happy.”

“Broke but Stress-Free.”

“WHO AM I, WHERE AM I, AND WHAT’S MY PURPOSE FOR BEING HERE ?”

“I’m proud to say, I AM an American and a Christian. Born and bred Texan!!!
True to God, and the Red, White, and Blue!!!”

Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart……..

Where else can you:
Work for a Jewish man ?
Drive an American made car/truck (heco en Mexico)?
Work with an African American ?
Ride a Japanese bike ?
Eat at a Italian restaurant ?
Shoot Belgian guns at Canadian birds ?
Buy gas from an Arab ?
Press 2 for Spanish ?
Drink Russian vodka ?
Marry a fine German woman ? What a great country we do live in.

“So young, so angry…”

“America is not perfect…and never has been. Still, I challenge you to find a better nation on Earth.”

“PBR = Pabst Blue Ribbon beer… It has been getting ugly people laid for years in the USA.”

“Talking to you is like talking to my ex wife. So focused on trying to get your point across that you don’t listen to a voice of reason.”

“Education is not a substitute for common sense and leadership abilities.”

“Tolerance is the virtue of a man without principles.” G. K. Chesterson

“Quit playing games. Forget about it and move on.”

“Why is common sense not so common?”

“Do not throw sticks at the three legged dog. It will think you are playing.”

“Sorry for being so brutal, but you needed a slap back into reality.”

“There’s a fine line between enjoying the scenery and the road.”

“I’m much better looking on-line.”

“Looks like it’s… Showtime!”

“There’s nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.” Goethe

“You’re excused. I see where you’re from.”

“Stop drinkin” the Koolaid! You’re freakin’ me out!”

December 3, 2008 Posted by | Quotes | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment