NirvanaPeace

Peace, Love, Joy, and Imagination…

Grandma goes to court…

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.

 

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know me?’

 

She responded, ‘Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.’

 

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?’

 

She again replied, ‘ Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.’

 

The defense attorney nearly died.

 

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, ‘If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.’

January 29, 2009 Posted by | Funnies | , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Grandma’s Pies

grandmas-pie

December 5, 2008 Posted by | Funnies | , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Pickles comic strip

 Pickles - December 3, 2008

 Pickles - December 2, 2008

 Pickles - December 1, 2008

 Pickles - November 29, 2008
 Pickles - November 29, 2008
 Pickles - November 28, 2008
 Pickles - November 27, 2008
 Pickles - November 25, 2008

 Pickles - November 22, 2008
 Pickles - November 21, 2008
 Pickles - November 20, 2008
 Pickles - November 19, 2008
 Pickles - November 16, 2008
 Pickles - November 15, 2008
 Pickles - November 14, 2008
 Pickles - November 13, 2008
 Pickles - November 12, 2008
 Pickles - November 9, 2008
 Pickles - November 4, 2008
 Pickles - November 2, 2008
 Pickles - October 29, 2008
 Pickles - October 28, 2008
 Pickles - October 26, 2008
 Pickles - October 25, 2008
 Pickles - October 21, 2008
 Pickles - October 18, 2008
 Pickles - October 16, 2008
 Pickles - October 15, 2008
 Pickles - October 14, 2008
 Pickles - October 13, 2008
 Pickles - October 11, 2008
 Pickles - October 9, 2008
 Pickles - October 8, 2008
 Pickles - October 5, 2008
 Pickles - October 4, 2008

December 4, 2008 Posted by | Comics | , , , , | Leave a comment